KEEP THE OLD WARM

Take away your opinion, and there is taken away the complaint, ‘I have been hurt.’ Take away the complaint, ‘I have been hurt,’ and the hurt is gone. – Marcus Aurelius: Meditations Chapter IV:7

Someone says something mean to you intending to hurt your feelings. They are there to be cruel. You then form an opinion about what was said, leading to a complaint against them. You choose to allow these words to penetrate your peace of mind. Now you are hurting and seek confrontation. They have gotten the best of you and taken it away. Don’t worry however, you can reclaim it at any time.

Someone says something mean to you intending to hurt your feelings. You listen, form no opinion about it, for you see it for what is is; an act of cruelty. You have no complaint about it, because you see the other person is likely acting such and such a way because they are in pain or are ignorant of what they do wrong, or are simply cruel. You maintain your inner peace and grace, for this behavior is beneath you. You simply, are content with your own peace and need not engage such a person and can leave them to their ways. The “hurt” never existed.

These are two ways to react to hurtful behavior directed at us by another person. One shows you can be influenced and gotten the better of. The other demonstrates your inner strength, contentment, and self-respect. One way is nearly instinctual, the other way is one that with practice, can also become instinctual.

We choose to be hurt and disturbed. We choose to be unaffected and at peace. Let us strive to make a wise choice.